Returning Christmas gifts from a charity

I saw a post on Facebook today that upset me. Someone posted a picture of shopping carts full of toys at Walmart. The story behind them is that they saw them and asked an employee if someone had bought all those toys. The employee says no then proceeds to tell them that they were returned gifts from charities that the parents returned them to get a gift card that they used to buy beer and cigarettes with. The person ends the post by telling people to be aware when giving toy to charity that this is happening. Here are my problems with this post. First when you return something to Walmart do you tell the clerk the whole back story of the item? I know I don’t I just simply say I need to return this. So how would they know these were gifts from a charity? Sounds like they just assumed to me. Second once you have finished the return and have your gift card do you ever go back to customer service and show them what you bought? I don’t, so how would they know what people used the gift cards on sounds like another assumption. Now there very well may be people who do this but to say they all do is just stereo typing and usually not true. My final problem with this post is that it seems to be discouraging people from giving and this makes me sad because for some families the gifts they get from charities is all they get. My family is one of those families and yes I have returned some things we received let me explain why and what I did with my gift card. My oldest son received a very nice coat for his gift. While normally this would be great my son is autistic and the material the coat was made from was one that he can’t wear due to sensory issues. So rather than give him a gift he can’t use and have it collecting dust in his closet I returned it. With the gift card I got for it I managed to get him 1) a set of ear buds the brand he likes and has been asking for, 2) a soft sensory friendly massage pillow that he has also been asking for, and 3) some food for our home since we are running seriously low. NO beer or cigarettes at all. For the same price as one gift we couldn’t use I got 2 he would love and food to keep all of us from going hungry. Here is another one I did, my youngest got 2 presents one was perfect he would love unfortunately the other was a set of sports ball it included a basketball, football, and soccer ball. Normally this would be a great present for a little boy but my son is in a wheel chair so this would just remind him of what he can’t do. So rather than have him be depressed for Christmas I returned it and instead got him a Lego set which is one of his favorite things and he will love. So you see sometimes there is a good legitimate reason why gifts from charities are being returned. Not all of them are returned just to get beer and cigarettes. Most, that I know of at least, do the same thing I did return things their children can’t or won’t use and get things they will. So when you see someone returning gifts don’t judge them or jump to conclusions. Things are not always what you think.

The challenge of not knowing

Raising a disabled child can be challenging, but when you don't have a diagnosis and no idea as to what it might be it makes it even more challenging. My youngest son will be turning 7 this year he started life with the odds stacked against him. Weighing in at only 3lbs 7oz the doctors said he wouldn't survive 48hrs. He surprised them and beat those odds. Over the years we have been told he wouldn't make it another month, or week, or even another day 4 different times. He has proven them all wrong, but it has been apparent that he had some problems. He has been tested for multiple things to date he has been diagnosed with ADHD, autism, and CP. Unfortunately there is still something else going on and we don't know what. For the past 6 months we have watched his legs slowly deteriorate from a clumsy child who can still run, ride a bike, and all the normal stuff to a child who spends half his day in a wheelchair. The doctors have been testing for everything they can think of and so far all the tests have come back normal. They can see that this is happening but have no idea why. He is currently in occupational therapy, speech therapy, and physical therapy, but rather than helping it seems to be making him worse. With out knowing what is causing the problem we don't know if we should continue the therapies or not everything is just a big question and it's seems like no one can find the answer. The only thing I know for sure is that my son Caleb is a fighter and will continue to overcome and surprise us and he will do it all with a smile.